Trotro Diaries: An Every Day Thing – Two

1

Tales of the daily life activities of min bus drivers and conductors at the various bus stations in the cities.

a mini bus with the bus conductor stepping out

Episode 2

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A cluster of assembled scraps fighting for dominance.

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Pee iii Peeiiii Pee iii

None of the mismatched uncoordinated running wheels wants to let up those scraps. What other word would best describe the state of these buses with bodies made of steel that have seen better days?

Sometimes polythene is seen in place of windows that have been folding in on themselves. 

Want a zoom in on the four cardinal ends of the wheels queued in the enclosed bus park? Of course here and there there were very few intact looking buses but none was willing to let up until a washed white bus with blue coloured doors- obviously attached parts, was unintentionally and unfortunately singled out for a headlong with a random bike man that was attempting to squeeze between the buses fighting for first place on which to exit the station. 

No surprise here. It was an unofficial Monday race. No form of trophy or award money is won but the drivers still partake.

You, you no get sense abi you know say you fool rynow?! 

Red held an already dishevelled bike man by the shirt ready to dish out some blows for the latter’s folly.

Wei you too you don’t get sense eh? 

Oh wei life too be that! 

Oh galawei you! 

Disgraceful human being

Passengers occupying the bus added their voices to that of their gallant bus conductor, some itching to get down if the bus was not “safely shut’.

But as the exchange ensued, a well-rounded stomach attached to a stout stocky figure can be spied alighting from the passenger side of the bus, carefully shutting the door afterwards not to bash any more parts that had suffered similar fate some minutes before.

Be why you no go do pass mate! 

Bike man still struggling to escape the bigger man’s hold will not shame his manhood. With the way he is breathing through one would think he ran a 100.

Most of the few people that had boarded the white-blue bus before it joined the daily park relay race and subsequently partook in the mini collision watched their driver disdainfully inspecting the vehicle with no shred of an attempt to ensure their safety.

Be why you no go do pass okada! FOOLISH boy.

Red was now passionate about the exchange and was looking to win. It was now a matter of honour, forget beating the errant nonentity.

With looks of satisfaction, eager eyes watched on. At least the bus conductor has a good mind to defend them, the unhappy bus occupants were for the moment appeased.

Oh wuuwu! Ofui grade four wheels! This is not okada! Na power bike be this rydhere! 

More heavy breaths and eyes fluttering like a changed bird, the bike man was internally calling on all his village deities to dissuade the mate from punching him for that statement.

So ebe why you wan die for the bike top? If you make ready die, die sharp la! You go die fast and rydhere noor which one you wan add me join top?

Red!

Now the bus inspection was completed to satisfaction and catching the tail end of the ongoing argument, Massa was not pleased one bit.

You want me then my masta join top?

We passengers too and this my preedy wifey you no want make e for grow so I for wife am?

The smart mate was quick to include when he felt the sharp stings of arrow gazes from within the bus amongst them a proud mother now adjusting her fussy toddler who at the moment was only consumed in her own tussle just with her mother’s blouse.   

Amidst all this chaos, some busses left the station but the lemon green minibus that bore the brunt of both cars crashed. During the heat no one noticed the driver step out or head towards the direction of the police annexing the bus station.

What is going on here!!!

Until five uniformed men arrived at the scene baptizing the place with silence. Even the snack itinerants hushed their call for potential buyers.

Sir..?

Sometimes ‘Boom’ or ‘Boom Boom’ has to be reminded of the intense pressure of his voice and personality. 

Officer!!

Today was one of those days for Boom. Unlucky is a station offender who is caught on his bad day. The first thing most first-timers always notice of this officer is his build, tall and muscly, not a single pouch to see making one believe the stories circulating the station that his meal plan consists of just stones. 

Some people may argue that his powerful walk…stump, or both, announces his presence before he’s seen…

Sir!

Even officer Tagoe knows not to push further the man was out for blood.

Report!

Sir that bus.

With a trembling gait, the officer attempted to verbatim the report filed by the driver of the collided bus.

Is that a bus?

One side mirror now somewhere on the station floor, the headlights a beautiful heap of colourful glass confetti reflecting on the impacted side running from underneath the polythene covered window…well some of the polythene now, that left the inspector confused whether it can be called a tire without the rubber part.

Yes sir.

Tagoe was certain it was a bus. That’s what busses looked like…right?

Proceed I just needed to make certain.

Sir, the plaintiff accused both the driver of this bus and the bike man of being in the wrong lanes. 

Pointing to both Massa and bike man respectfully, the latter who was still successfully in Red’s tight grip.

Me? Ar just telam e for die and lef people alone. But Aboagye what too be that? Why you go tell them say ebi we do you?

Red was tempted to leave bike man and send some sense inspiring punches to Aboagye’s head. The sneaky fool has been looking for a way to fix his junk even though the youngest member of the park is aware he now wants to take advantage of the situation.

Bright looking eyes that did not match overly chubby cheeks on a small head attached to a short sticky frame, Aboagye or Aboagin. The name speaks true to the personality. Drinks too much with all his earnings remembering that something needs to be fixed only after he has sobered up.

Boom accessed the situation with experienced eyes and decided. Morning to his posse he matched off.

Ok everyone involved to the station. Move it! Hey! Pack your bus properly before. The rest move it.

This was the part Tagoe obviously loved about his job.

Officer Ransford!

Sir!

Stay behind and escort the rest to the station. The rest of you move it. Hurry up.

Yes sir!

NB: read Episode 1 here.

To be continued…….new episode every WEEKEND. Subscribe to receive notifications. Leave your comments below.

By Jamila Abdul Wahab Follow on Twitter @activetvgh

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